Storytelling: Human beings, by default, are enrapt by stories, or more specifically, a story arc. Politicians use them to campaign, teachers use them to explain important concepts, comedians use them to make us laugh, and we use them constantly in our day-to-day interactions.
But what you probably didn’t notice is that the best communicators you know are fantastic story-tellers.
Have you ever had a friend who would start telling you about something and it just seemed to go nowhere? Like, they’d start telling you about their trip to Chicago and after describing the hotel and maybe mentioning the concierge, the story just died?
Or have you ever known someone who consistently makes jokes that don’t completely make sense, or fizzle out and aren’t funny?
Or maybe you’re one of these people. Do people ever stop paying attention to you mid-story? Or do you have trouble making others laugh (intentionally, that is)?
Chances are, these people (or you), aren’t following a strong story arc. For whatever reason, humans have evolved to be absolutely fascinated when information is communicated in a certain pattern.
This is true of just about any culture and background.
Set up: The set up is exactly that: you’re setting the scene or the context for what you’re about to say. It’s the foundation of what’s about to be told, and if you don’t set up properly, then your stories, jokes and ideas will always seem to be random. People will consistently comment that you’re really random, weird, or “off the wall.”
Content/Conflict: After setting up that you’re going to talk about, you get into the actual content. This can also be the “conflict” in your story. Whatever it is, it’s something that causes tension and expentancy. The content of your story needs to be intriguining and hook people into wanting to know what will happen next. If you don’t build much tension with the content of your stories, you will find people losing interest or get the feeling like you ramble on a lot.
Resolution: The resolution releases the tension from the conflict or content. Resolutions can come in forms of punchlines (for jokes), conclusions (for ideas), or just closure for a generic story. People who don’t resolve their stories and ideal well will often get blank stares when they’ve finished speaking, or people asking them, “Yeah,and...” not realizing that the story is finished.
Here’s an example of a story with a setup, content/conflict, and a resolution:
When I was in college, my first roomate had a funny habit whenever he got drunk. He’d basically turn into a narcoleptic — he’d spontaneously fall asleep in strange places and at random moments.
Well, literally the first night I knew this guy, he and I go out to some orientation party. We meet a couple girls and go back to their dorm with them. He and I are totally drunk and I notice he’s kind of stopped talking to his girl and is dozing off in the corner. Kind of weird, but it was like 3 AM, so whatever. Suddenly, he says he’s going to go and gets up and leaves. I think nothing of it until I go home, wake up the next morning and he’s still not back. Hours pass and I start getting worried (Content/Conflict).
It turns out that the guy went out into the hallway lobby, laid down on the floor and slept there the whole night. But not only that, he left his jacket in the girl’s room. So at like 9 in the morning he had to sneak back in, wake her up and take his jacket back. It was pretty hilarious at the time. Buy yeah, that was my college roomate (Resolution).
Often adding a line like, “Yeah, that was my college roomate,” is good because it indicates that the story is finished and that you’re finished speaking.
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