Okay. You've met someone, you've asked them out, and you've just shared a dinner, movie, concert or some combination of similar activities that added up to your first few hours in each other's company. Now that first date is winding down and you are wondering whether we should kiss? It's a good question because timing matters when it comes to kissing, especially when it's the first kiss. All the technique and skill in the world won't save a kiss that's planted on the lips of someone who either wasn't ready at that moment or isn't interested in being kissed at all.
In the somewhat cynical, seen-it-all era that we live in, whether or not to kiss on the first date may seem like a fairly mundane question to focus on. but it's not. In fact, few questions related to dating get asked about and discussed more often. A Google search will reveal how much debate for this topic is, and you can join any one of dozens of online conversations hashing out the pros and cons of each opinion.
The reason for all this chatter is simple. That first kiss changes things. Up until that point a couple who's interested in each other can still consider themselves "just friends" — but a kiss ratchets things up a bit. You may not be a serious couple quite yet, but you're also not just casual pals. With one kiss — that first kiss — you acknowledge a deeper level of interest. It may be romance, it may be commitment or it may just be arousal that you are interested in, but you've demonstrated that you've definitely got more on your mind than just hanging out.
The other reason that the timing of that first kiss inspires so much debate is that the rules for dating are no longer so clearly defined. Things used to be a lot less complicated. In our grandparents' day (or, depending on how young you are, great-grandparents'), the answer to "Should we kiss on the first date?" was an emphatic "Of course not!" Couples waited, and those that didn't were labeled "Moose" or "easy." Back then, most couples held off kissing until a magic number of dates was reached (three dates being a popular rule of thumb at one point). But things have changed. Today, most people are no longer guided by social pressure or some external moral code, but by their own feelings and values. While there's a lot to be said for that change, it also means that there's no clear consensus anymore about what's appropriate and acceptable, and that can make navigating the dating process a bit bumpier.
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