A good quality marriage shall be wisely managed by a smart and wise mind through your behaviors everyday. Hereby, several tips on deeds to be avoided in order to gain a superior marriage quality are provided for you to take as reference. You can reflect on yourself each day you stay with your partner.
Tip 1: Avoid the Four Horsemen
According to psychologist Gottman, the four horsemen to avoid in marriage are：
Criticism -As opposed to a compJaint about a certain action, criticism goes deeper and attacks the person by pointing out flaw in their character. Anyone can change, so don't make it toe? personal.
Contempt - This is always disrespectful, and shows annoy-ances by eye-rolling, sneering, and hostile humor.
Defensiveness - Take responsibility and stop always pointing the finger at the other person. It's so easy to do this, because nobody wants to feel like they did something wrong.
Stonewalling - This means that one of the partners tunes out. It means you don’care anymore what the other is saying or doing. If you are stonewalling and close yourself off from the relationship, try to find out if you’re doing it too quickly. If your partner is doing it, then take a good look at yourself and wonder if you might have been too harsh, mean, or unreasonable.
Tip2：Stop Complaining
Youknow... those people who complain about almost anything? Don't be that person, people who constantly express their discontent about the food, the weather, the temperature, their bodily aches, the people around then or even the whole government, the system, the church, society, or the human race. Nothing in this world is perfect, a you will always be victimized by the vicissitudes of life t the unfair dealings of those around you. Let’s go and try develop an attitude of gratitude.
Tip 3 Don’t Compare
Don't compare your spouse to others if it turns out to be negative. Even if you see a woman you may find more attractive, don't say it. If you notice someone's cooking is more impressive, keep quiet, if that guy in the suit is making tons more money or if that basketball player on the court dunked over your husband, leave it alone. You can forget about it by telling yourself the following things： 1) Thie person you are comparing your partner to isn't perfect either. He or she might have hidden flaws, addictions, secrets, or quirks you would find out about later if you were to cheat on your spouse and start a relationship with that person.
Don't idealize other people. 2) You chose your partner. Stick with your decision. You didn't choose your partner for nothing, but because you were impressed and head-over-heels. Don't lose that feeling.
Tip 4: Don't Embarrass Him/Her in Public
Its okay to joke around, but be careful with making fun of your spouse or pointing out his/her flaws in public. Doing so is almost like telling people that you are secretly suffering because you're not content with your spouse. I know it can be tempting sometimes, but you have to figuratively bite your tongue and leave it alone.
Tip 5: Don't Be a Perfectionist
Do I have to say much else? Everyone makes mistakes, and so do you. Better to learn from them than to hold them against each other.
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