We as adults so easily forget the art of playfulness. It is the ability to let go of control and to frolic and be silly. It's the feeling that you deserve to have fun and being able to anticipate it. Then you have to learn to truly go along with the fun once you’ve created it. Remember that our Creator plays and knows we need this important skill to enjoy Him and participate fully in intimacy: "I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing [playing and laughing] always in his presence, rejoicing [playing] in his whole world and delighting in mankind." (Prov.8:30-3lNIV).
Making love is certainly built on the foundation of play. I am reminded of Christ's teaching that to truly experience the kingdom of God, we need to become like little children. Great sex takes place in the child state of the ego. An important part of being childlike is reveling in the awe of the moment and exhibiting uninhibited excitement or curiosity. Children love to ask about the nature of things, and they like to try them out in a playful manner. They are great teachers of amusement, as I learn every time my grand-daughter and I spend time together. She squeals and claps her hands and is awed by something as simple as a flower.
I've taken the liberty of paraphrasing Christ's advice: "unless you become childlike and learn to be playful, you will never experience God’s kingdom of unbelievable intimacy." Learn from children's playfulness. They can be self-directed and demand pleasure. In their childlike mentality, life is a big playground, and they expect to have fun. Oh, how children love to sing at the top of their voices and big grins come so easily! Children can be excited a whole day about an anticipated ice-cream cone. Adults, however, sometimes have to be on vacation for two days before getting relaxed and starting to have fun. Playfulness is perhaps best described by the terms joyful excitement, eager curiosity, light hearted fun, and spontaneous frolicking. Playfulness is the ability to be unpretentious and candid as you demand things with enthusiasm and laughter—expecting your needs to be met.
You cannot work at creating better lovemaking; you and your mate have to play at it. This character trait can be practiced in other areas of your life and then lessons learned may be brought over into your sex life. Get silly;anticipate an event for a week or more; risk a new behavior; laugh until you have tears in your eyes or roll on the floor; tickle and chase each other around the whole house; get wide-eyed with awe and wonder about something. In this, you are becoming a great lover.
Playing has a way of connecting people. Gentle teasing, shared games, and mutual laughter can be bonding experiences. Even sexual mistakes Can create playful memories. So often in making love, partners do things that are silly or embarrassing. As playful partners, you can laugh rather than be awkward. You each have this childlike playfulness that is longing to be unleashed.
Time Out: Take time when you are out this week to stop and buy yourself a toy or two that would encourage you to play. You may want some that you and your mate can enjoy together, such as water pistols, jump ropes, rub-on tattoos, or Tinkertoy building blocks.
Comment