Your partner can either rock your life or not add much value to it or completely sink your ship. Think carefully how you feel when you are with them. Do they add more value to your life?
Do They Give You Confidence?
Do you find yourself feeling more confident with your partner? Are they constantly praising, appreciating and motivating even the smallest milestones/achievements in your life. Though you may not need someone else to make you feel confident, it may help to be with a person who is perpetually reiterating how wonderful you are and boosting your confidence even further. Think if your partner boosts your confidence or is always pulling you down through their actions or words.
Appreciating others comes naturally to people who are positive, happy and confident. Their high self-esteem thrives on cooperation and not competition. They don’t view other people as potential threats. On the hand, people lacking in self-esteem and confidence find it easy to pull down others with their hurtful words and actions.
People low on confidence are more likely to see their partners as competition and pull them down at every given opportunity with their seemingly harmless remarks. There is greater scope for insecurity, jealousy and over-possessiveness if your partner is unsure about themselves or the relationship. Does your partner suffer from self-esteem issues that prevent them from boosting your confidence?
Do They Boost Your Self-Esteem?
Does your partner routinely make you feel miserable about yourself by failing to actively encourage you to feel wonderful about who you are? Or worse, do they always put you down knowingly or unknowingly? Do they act miserly when it comes to complimenting you? Do you get a feeling that you always come last in their list of priorities? Do you often find them treating your dreams or aspirations scornfully? Do they make fun of your goals and objectives? Do you find yourself constantly being compared to other men/women and never match up? Does your partner often make not so flattering remarks about you in a group? Do they seen disinterested in you? These are all important questions to ask yourself because consciously or subconsciously these factors may damage your self-esteem.
If you are constantly being compared to other men /women and made to feel how they score over you or if your partner is perpetually making disparaging comments about you in public, it isn’t doing much to make you feel good about yourself, if the not so flattering things they say outnumber the good things they feel or say about you, the relationship is headed for trouble sooner or later. Your partner not speaking well about you or constantly trying to pull you down. Are you prepared to live with someone who view themselves and you in a poor light?
Is your partner always resentful? Do they always make sour remarks about you or compliment you generously? Do they rarely say anything positive about you? Are they supportive of your dreams, goals and achievements? Do they always play the blame game?
A person who is always putting you down and blunting your sense of self worth may be consciously or unconsciously attempting to prevent you from leaving them by suggesting “no one else would want you’’ or “you are lucky to have someone like me” or “I could have dated anyone I wanted’’ or “plenty of people are still interested in dating me.’’
You get the flow right? In an attempt to boost their ego and keep you attached, they make you feel bad about yourself. Is your partner trying to bolster their self-esteem by damaging yours? Is what they say more a reflection of what they feel or think about themselves than a reflection of who you are?
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