Lifestyle, courage and communication are the three fundamentals in which a man can become more vulnerable and less needy. They can be interpreted in the following sentences: 1. Creating an attractive and enriching lifestyle; 2. Overcoming your fears and anxiety around socializing, intimacy and sexuality; 3. Mastering the expression of your emotions and communicating fluidly. To make it more simply, the three fundamentals can be referred to as Honest living, honest action and honest communication.
Honest living
Honest living means create an attractive life-style which involves really drilling down and understanding what you want as a man for your life and then working to make that a reality. If you're in a job you hate, with hobbies you hate and friends you don't like, then no matter what you do or how much money you make, you're going to have a hard time meeting attractive women whom you enjoy and who enjoy being with you. This is because the identity you have adopted does not accurately reflect your emotional needs and desires. You're not living your life honestly, which means that you're not investing in yourself and you are needy and unattractive.
If your true passion is art and you push paper around at an insurance firm, then you're not living honestly. You've compromised your identity in some way to fit what others hav dictated it should be; in this case, you've given up what actually makes you happy in order to fit the values or roles of other people in society (having a stabel job, working in the corporate world, having a nice house/car). This displays a lack of vulnerability and non-neediness.
If those things aren't actually important to you, then you have a responsibility to yourself to change. Otherwise, you're always going to be an unattractive man because you're living 40 hours a week investing your identity in what others want out of you and not what you want of yourself. This is like baseline neediness and until you straighten this out, you will be needy with every woman you meet, preventing you from meeting the truly amazing women that you could potentially be with one day.
Honest action
Honest action is overcoming your fear and axiety. Our anxiety is another form in which we highly invest ourselves in others' perceptions and avoid our truth. It is honest action because it is honesty in the strictest terms. For example, if you see a beautiful woman and have a desire to meet her, not taking any action and meeting her is a form of being dishonest with yourself. If you see a woman who catches your interest in a bar and you keep looking at her all night because you're afraid to do something on a deep level, you're being dishonest about your own intentions and sexuality. You're being overly invested in her and others' opinions and are unable to expose your vulnerability.
All fear around your sexuality is a result of feeling inferior or unworthy. If you're afraid to approch a woman, it reflects that inside your heart, you are more invested in her opinion of you than you're in your own opinion of yourself.
Overcoming your fear and anxiety will correlate with your overall results with women. The reason being that once a man overcomes his fear of rejection, he's willing to more or less pursue any woman he wants. Even if you are a deadbeat or even if he's terrible at expressing himself, he will eventually meet women who want to date him and sleep with him.
Honest communication
Honest communication means learning to express yourself freely and effectively. This is what most dating advice sells and classified as "game" - a good sense of humor, the ability to connect with people, telling stories, engaging people's attentions, having charisma and expressing your sexuality openly.
What the three fundamental correlates?
Honest living correlates directly with the quality of women that you will attract. The more in-tune you are to your life style, the more you take care of your appearance and your health, the higher the quality of women you will attract and the greater percentage of receptive women you'll meet. Honest action correlates directly to the women you meet and attract. Honest communication will determine the efficiency with which you're able to attract women who are compatible to you. A man who communicates poorly or is unable to express himself clearly will lose into misunderstandings, vague communications, inaccurate assumptions, etc.
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